Like most men, my father had no feeling in his face, so that when he ate ribs and buttery corn, he’d appear to have applied it externally, as you would an aftershave.
Category: Gin
IT’S A BOY!!!
After Smartacus left, White Fang became an ironic, super-bored princess -- you know the type. Shaggy manes. Legs like palm trees. Look so great climbing out of a pool.
Top Gun Moments
Know who I remind myself of? Jimmy Piersall, baseball’s most-famous flake, who once described diapering this way: "Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond. Then fold second base down to home...
My Dog Is Only Human
Welcome to summer -- shorts, sandals and sheer cotton dresses…gin by the pool, margaritas by moonlight.
On the Road Again
By the end of this roadtrip, I'm quite smitten with your basic, garden-variety giraffe.
Stairway to Heaven
Devil’s Gate Dam has a rep as a playground for the occult, and there are steamy stories of seances and love affairs and mysterious disappearances.
Our Prettiest Prayers
In a single year, this grandbaby has left a mark on my heart…her vainglorious filigree.
The Hybrid Widower
"Happy Mother's Day, dude," they said. So at their urging, I drank a six-pack.
This Old Casa
Oh, this old house. A good place to peel potatoes or butter a turkey. If the water is running, you can’t hear the TV.
LA’s Camelot Beach
Why are we on Santa Monica Beach? First of all, the place is a poem -- I’ve written sonnets to it before.